As is the case with the careers of quite a few actors who’ve been in the business for decades,Jon Voight’s output, as an actor, can certainly be called inconsistent. Well, that’s putting it mildly. Voight’s had starring roles in some ofthe best movies of all time, includingMidnight Cowboy,Heat, andDeliverance, and has also delivered impressive performances in some slightly more underrated movies likeRunaway TrainandComing Home.
And then on the other end of things, you have some of the soon-to-be-mentioned titles, which… well, they’re not onHeat’s level, that much can be said quite comfortably.Jon Voight has been in a lot, and so it’s not surprising that some of his movies are stinkers, with the following being the worst of the worst, ranked from the pretty bad to the all-time worst.
10’Anaconda' (1997)
Directed by Luis Llosa
Some people might defendAnaconda, whether it be nostalgic for certain individuals, or maybe some people just like this very 1990s brand of schlock. There is something slightly fun about it in parts,since it is a very stupid movie about a very big snake, and everything is so broad and crudely thrown togetherthat it almost feels like it could be a parody.
To Jon Voight’s credit, he might’ve understood better than anyone else in the cast what kind of movie he was in.
Jon Voight contributes quite a lot toAnacondafeeling like something of a near-comedy, since he goes completely over-the-top in a scenery-devouring villainous role, speaking in an absolutely ridiculous accent all the while. To his credit, he might’ve understood better than anyone else in the cast what kind of movie he was in. Still, it’s not enough to save the film in the traditional sense, sincethis is a pretty bad creature feature, but featuring Voight at his hammiest is better than nothing.
9’Reagan' (2024)
Directed by Sean McNamara
Well,Reagancan’t entirelybe called a bland biopic, at the very least. Neither can this film aboutRonald Reaganbe called good, in the traditional sense, but it’s pretty wild and thereby sporadically entertaining. Voight has a supporting role here as a KGB agent named Viktor Petrovich, while it’sDennis Quaidwho gets the starring role, playing Ronald Reagan.
It’s awkward stuff, on a filmmaking front, regardless of how you might feel about Ronald Reagan himself, or what he stood for.Reaganmight also be a tough sell unless you feel you might get something out of an awkwardly done biopic that covers a great many decades but ultimately says very little (and in a film that’s nearly 2.5 hours long, that’s not great).
8’Megalopolis' (2024)
Directed by Francis Ford Coppola
Like withAnaconda, there are moments of fun to be found inMegalopolis(sometimes thanks to Jon Voight himself), even if much of the film is a slog.Francis Ford Coppolahas undeniably madesome of the greatest movies of all time, and he also made this one. But, to his credit, this does feel like something he was passionate about and wanted to make, and by gosh, he made it his way.
And what a way it was. As for the plot… what? Plot? InMegalopolis? This movie doesn’t tell a story, and instead just has way too many characters doing random things, and then some of the dialogue spells out a handful of broad themes. It’sthe kind of bizarre trip of a moviewhere some things feel intentionally funny, some of the comedy feels unintentional, andthen other stretches of the film are rather boring. But Jon Voight does get to fire a little bow and arrow. It’s got that going for it.
Megalopolis
7’The Painter' (2024)
Directed by Kimani Ray Smith
The Painteris thankfully pretty obscure, so it’s unlikely to taint the lives of too many people, but that’s one of the only nice things that can be said about it.It’s a pretty awful action/thriller movie, with a pretty boring plot that’s about an ex-CIA operative getting wrapped up in the sorts of things you’d expect a character like that to get wrapped up in.
There are other highly-skilled killers coming after him, there’s a woman from his past who resurfaces, andthere’s a continuing sense of him having to fight for his life, blah-blah-blah, and on and on until the movie just sort of ends. It’s only occasionally silly enough to be a tiny bit funny, and even Voight seems pretty checked out of this one, making it inferior toAnacondaandMegalopolisby default.
The Painter
6’Mercy' (2023)
Directed by Tony Dean Smith
Released one year beforeThe Painter,Mercyis similarly obscure,but it’s also another recent stinkerthat will show no mercy (ha) to anyone unfortunate enough to stumble upon it. Most ofMercyrevolves around a hostage situation at a hospital, and a doctor with a history in the military serves as the central character, fighting back against those who’ve taken over the hospital while trying to save her son, who’s one of the hostages.
It’s one of many movies that feels like it’s putting a spin onthe influentialDie Hardformula…Die Hardin a hospital, maybe? And Jon Voight is there. And that’s about it. The existence of something likeMercyis strange.Who is it for? Why is it here? Why are we here? Why are movies?Who are? Why do?What are next?
5’An American Carol' (2008)
Directed by David Zucker
David Zuckerhas had a hand in making some ofthe best parody movies of all time, especially as one third of the trio known asZucker, Abrahams and Zucker(the other two beingJim Abrahamsand David’s brother,Jerry). However,An American Carolis not up to the standard of David Zucker’s better-known movies, even though it’s kind of a parody/takedown ofMichael Moore, the filmmaker… but also, it’s a take onA Christmas Carol.
CallingAn American Carolweird is an understatement, and that’s before getting to the fact that Jon Voight is featured here asGeorge Washington, because why not?Leslie Nielsenis also in this, playing two roles, and one of them isOsama bin Laden. Does any more need to be said?
An American Carol
4’Getaway' (2013)
Directed by Courtney Solomon
Certainly not to be mixed up with the rather goodSteve McQueen-starring movie,The Getaway, 2013’sGetawayis instead a not-at-all-good movie starringEthan Hawke. Voight is here once more as a villain, holding the wife of Hawke’s character hostage while making him do all sorts of wild things behind the wheel of a custom car that goes very fast.
It’s a shame the movie doesn’t feel fast, fun, or furious, though, instead beinga tiring slog of a crime/thriller film with some pretty limp action and a 90-minute runtime that feels so much longer.Getawayis a waste of Ethan Hawke for sure, and also a waste of Jon Voight and, yes, evenSelena Gomez, who also stars in this. It’s a movie that’s been forgotten, more or less, for good reason.
3’Dangerous Game: The Legacy Murders' (2022)
There areplenty of good murder-mystery movies out there, andDangerous Game: The Legacy Murderssure as hell ain’t one of them. The premise here involves a family reunion that does indeed turn deadly, and everyone has to survive and whatever.It’s directed bySean McNamara, who also directedReaganwith Jon Voight, so maybe that’s a sign of what to expect here.
It takes things that have worked so well in other movies and makes them all weirdly boring here.Dangerous Game: The Legacy Murdershas a clunky title and a clunky everything else,doing even less than going through the motions and being close to fascinating in the process. It’s another Voight-starring movie that’s odd enough for just existing. Again, who is it for, and why was it made?
Dangerous Game: The Legacy Murders
2’The Karate Dog' (2004)
Directed by Bob Clark
The Karate Dogshouldn’t be avoided just because it’s kind of an English-language martial arts movie, since some goodmartial arts movies have been made outside Asia. Instead, it should be avoided because it’sThe Karate Dog. This isone of the worst films of 2004, and might well even be up there (or down there) as one of the worst family movies ever made.
It’s obscure since it was a TV movie, and so at least the largest screens around the world were spared from having some of the images in this movie projected onto them. It’s about a dog who does indeed know karate, following him as he teams up with an LAPD computer expert to track down the murderer of his master.Jon Voight, at one point, fights the dog. Don’t watch this, even if that last sentence might’ve madeThe Karate Dogsound a little enticing.
The Karate Dog
1’Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2' (2004)
But for as bad asThe Karate Dogwas, it wasn’t quiteas awful as the other 2004 filmdirected byBob Clarkand starring Jon Voight: the beyond-infamousSuperbabies: Baby Geniuses 2. It’s hard to know where to begin. Maybe there won’t be any beginning. It’s all about the end.Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2is a sign, perhaps, that the end times are here. They’ve been coming, dawning, approaching (or whatever) since 2004. Game over, man. Game over.
Voight was in some great movies back in the 1970s. AndBob Clark used to make actual movies all those decades ago, too, including two ofthe best Christmas movies of all time: 1974’sBlack Christmasand 1983’sA Christmas Story. But then both men were also a part ofSuperbabies: Baby Geniuses 2. What a world.
